How do we console those who need it most? Is this even something you’ve thought about? Now that I’ve mentioned it, do you even care, or has it already slipped your mind?
As I write this, I am on the train in Toronto, sitting beside 2 young children accompanied by their parents. The kids can’t be older than 8. As we reached one stop, a woman, probably in her late 20’s, boards the train. Her eyes are bloodshot red, and incredibly glossy. Not in the “I just got high af” kind of way, but after seeing a single tear fall from her wounded eyes, it was clear she had been crying right before getting onto the train. Instantly, I felt sorry for her. I sat there wondering what could have happened to make her emotions take over in public, with so many bystanders staring and whispering. I even caught myself being more nosey than concerned. While I battled these thoughts in my mind, the young girl beside me turned to her brother and pointed out the upset woman. She asked him why she was crying. Since he didn’t have an answer for her, the young girl got up from her seat, and approached the woman herself. She innocently smiled then greeted the woman. Then I heard her say “why are you sad?” The woman told the girl “I am not sad anymore. I was feeling bad before but I am ok now. Thank you.” She gently tapped the girl on her head before she ran back to the vacant seat beside her older brother. The woman turned to the child’s mother, and smiled.
I was in awe. This young child, unbeknownst to her, single handedly improved this woman’s mood. Now, its not to say all things will be peachy now, and whatever had her in an emotional rut was fixed. But in that moment, the woman’s sadness had disappeared. A child was able to identify a person in need of support and consolation, a perfect stranger at that, and do what was within her ability to make her feel better about herself.
For the rest of that ride, I was left to think about my own character. I could learn a thing or two from someone who’s probably only learned a thing or two. Emotions and feelings are so powerful. They have the ability to shape our day for better or for worse. They can lead us to self-destruction, or self preservation. Sometimes a simple check in on a person you know is battling with an issue can uplift their spirit. I know from experience that when I’ve had those dark moments, a call or message offering ears or support went a long way. As people, we’re not always searching for the answer. In some cases it’s a matter of acknowledgment. Not validation, but simply having someone recognize your pain, and if they can continue to support you through it, thats the biggest win.
It’s important to understand the power we possess within ourselves. To know that simple gestures like a smile can do wonders. The first step is giving a damn. Living in a world that is so self-obsessed, and centred around our own lives, theres a bit of a challenge with stepping outside of our boxes to help someone unpack theirs. We talk about wanting the world to be a better place after seeing the gruesome acts of violence and destruction around the globe, but will ignore the cries of a young woman on public transit, because it doesn’t affect our lives. My focus this year is to build character not clout. Developing myself into a person I can look at in the mirror without feeling shame, or regret for the things I’ve done or should have done. In the words of the late great Micheal Jackson, “I’m gonna make a change, for once in my life. Its gonna feel real good, gonna make a difference.” Start with yourself. We can all do better.
Managed By Marwa 